From: athe nonrex (athenonrex@godisdead.com)
Date: Thu Jan 22 2004 - 13:22:48 MST
alright...i was trying to avoid pontificating my own personal
philosophy...but with debate surrounding the first law of lucifer,
and the emergence of a trademarked term...i must...
and now i pontificate away...
"The Book of Dorkus" Part II
<snip>
Part 2
1
Well, so far as to say “the world will end!” I’m sure it will one day perhaps end. But that’s nothing of my concern; it’s up to the planet whether it wants to get in the way of an asteroid or something of that nature. It’s just another way that Life tries to get us in the Game of Life (to be explained later). Does the world end? Merely because I say or act like it will? Fuck No ™. Does the world even slow down when I try to make someone else think that it’s going to end? [Reiteration] Fuck No™. Why bother then?
It seems a bit of a jump to expect Life not to use all of its skills to try and thwart you. This is after all a game. Okay, I was going to explain it later, but now seems as good a time as any. There is a book that I often reference. It’s called “The Game of Life™”. This book cannot be found in stores (not even barns and nobles). It can be found in only one place: my penial gland*.
2
(excerpt from “The Game of Life™”):
“Wherein life is such as it does exist (obviously), it must also be taken into consideration that there are many given numbers of ways to interpret this thing we call life. Many of these considerations are quite amusing, often without intent of being so. Many of these considerations are downright staunchy and inflexible. Many of these considerations haven’t even truly been considered. But those are other books, from other penial glands, some of which are far less amusing than this penial gland.
“This penial gland chooses to view this life as a game. Now this game might be played on a figurative PlayStation, or a figurative X-Box, or even on a figurative Atari system. Yeah, a figurative Atari system…that sounds good. Okay, let’s run with that one…insert a little ™ sign and we’re set to go…if life is viewed through a Figurative Atari System™, then we must conclude that it is “The Game of Life™” and that we are indeed playing it. Therefore, since it is a game, we must have an opponent of some sort.
“This is where most people get mixed up. We think of other people in this Game as our potential opponents, but that’s simply not so (if viewed through the Figurative Atari System™ that is…). The real opponent would actually be Life, as Life is what always turns out to be the “obstacle” that we encounter, or otherwise engenders the “obstacle” that we encounter.
“This again is also where people get mixed up, if they even made it this far. Life is what throws us these “obstacles” true. But Life is also aware that this is a game. And thusly, she plays as though it were a game. It’s not Life’s fault if some people can’t understand that it’s just a game.”
“Life is a Game, Play Discordianly™.”
See? Life is a game, and she plays her part in the game like the big dork she is. It’s not malicious, or malevolent…she just plays the game, expecting that you’re aware that it’s a game…and you’re a dork for not seeing that it is a game (but you’re a Dork™ if you realize that it is a game…)
Part 3
1
Being a dork is no laughing matter. Being a Dork™ is more than a laughing matter. Laughing, mucking about in the water and generally having a good time are serious business to a Dork™ (about as serious as we can get, that is.) And wherever there is Chaos, we are there, forming it, shaping it, molding it, creating and destroying it like putty. And we do this to rack up “points” in the Game of Life™ right? Fuck No™!
We do it because it’s fun. We do it because, even when we mess up and things come out differently than we intended, it’s spectacular, and beautiful…and often quite amusing.
2
The fact that we don’t care…this scares people. We love a good game, and “Life is the Ultimate Game™.” So we naturally have lots of fun, often laughing for no reason. Sometimes we weep at something so incredibly simple and common and happenstance because it’s so utterly and completely beautiful. On occasion we sprinkle little drops of random kindness into the lives of the random people we happen across. Even still, on occasion we beat the snot outta each other for Shits N’ Giggles™ (hey, what’s creation without a little destruction now and again?)
It doesn’t take learning, it takes unlearning…
All lines, names, slogans and Such are ™ (Totally Misused) and are hereby subject to no copyright laws. (K) all rights reversed.
<snip>
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